Nicolas Shaun Miller's ‘cry for help’ exposes serious addiction to child exploitation material

7:29 pm on 2 June 2025

First published on

Tracy Neal, Open Justice multimedia journalist

Nicolas Miller told the police after he tried to take his own life that he had a “serious addiction to child porn” and was afraid his offending would worsen. He has been sentenced to three-and-a-half years in prison. Photo: Open Justice via New Zealand Herald / Tracy Neal

Warning: This story covers topics including online child exploitation and attempted suicide that may be upsetting to some readers.

A man's attempt at taking his own life opened a Pandora's Box on his addiction to child exploitation material.

Now a judge has deemed the man's quick confession to the police was a cry for help but said it didn't excuse his actions.

Nicolas Shaun Miller told the police after they found thousands of items of objectionable material on his computer that he had a "serious addiction" to what he called "child porn".

The confession to the police came about in "unusual circumstances", Judge Jo Rielly recently said in the Nelson District Court.

Crown prosecutor Daniel Baxter said it was a sad situation for all involved.

Defence lawyer Mark Dollimore said in some ways, Miller's addiction had almost killed him.

A boring, monotonous life

The 31-year-old had been living alone in a caravan in Murchison, in the southern Tasman District, in what Dollimore described as "squalid conditions".

Miller said he led a "boring, monotonous life", and, when he was not working, he played video games and drank to excess.

He no longer had much contact with family, he was alone and isolated, Dollimore said.

He said that on 17 November last year when Miller had tried to end his life he had consumed cannabis, watched pornography and the reality of his situation and his addiction had overwhelmed him.

Miller was taken to Nelson Hospital and treated for serious self-inflicted wounds.

"He came very close to killing himself. It was touch and go for him in ICU," Dollimore said.

Miller later said he had tried to take his own life because he knew he had a serious problem that he struggled with, but didn't know where to reach out for help.

Miller believed his addiction might lead to contact offending with a child which he feared he might not be able to resist, and that he favoured a "particular type" which he himself found abhorrent, Judge Rielly said.

A cry for help

She said Miller's effort to speak up was a cry for help, but it didn't excuse the illegal behaviour.

He was sentenced to three-and-a-half years in prison on seven charges, one of which was a representative charge, of knowingly possessing an objectionable publication.

It wasn't until after mental health services had assessed Miller in November that a police investigation followed and he was charged.

Miller had told a mental health staff member that he had been viewing "child porn" for the previous two or three years, and the police were notified.

After a search of his address, several electronic items, including a computer tower, were seized.

Forensic examination of the tower suggested it contained objectionable material on about 16,000 files. A subsequent search confirmed 14,146 items as objectionable.

Miller had also accessed websites that had bestiality content on them.

The representative charge covered an "extensive number" of images found on a hard drive, some of which were classified as the most serious of their type.

Miller told the police that he viewed the images daily because they "excited him" but he knew he had a major problem.

Miller also told the police he understood that viewing child exploitation material was not a victimless crime, and that children endured "horrific atrocities" in the making of such material, fuelled by viewers such as himself.

He 'fessed up' early

Dollimore said Miller had "fessed up" early and had co-operated with the police in every way he could, and that he was desperate for help.

Baxter said it was Miller's honesty that led to his offending coming to light, and the Crown was not opposed to credit being given for Miller's request for help.

Judge Rielly said that from everything Miller had said, not only was he feeling extremely low about himself, but he was also very concerned about where his addiction might lead him.

Judge Rielly said Miller also knew his behaviour could change for the worse and he did not want that to happen.

In setting a prison starting point at five years, Judge Rielly said although Miller's relationship with his family was now strained, he had not sought to blame anything about his background for his offending.

He was given credit for his early guilty plea and for demonstrating his remorse, his shame, his insight into the offending and his readiness to rehabilitate, to arrive at a sentence of three-and-a-half years on the representative charge and two-and-a-half years on the remaining charges, to be served concurrently.

Miller was automatically registered as a child sex offender.

Where to get help:

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Samaritans: 0800 726 666.
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